Golf club dullness

Leamington Courier: New manager for golf club

Classic press release work.

Spotter's Badge: Rob

No idea what's going on here weirdness

Leamington Spa Courier: 'We can't just bask in the sun'

First in an occasional series of editorial cock-ups that somehow made it through to the live service.

Spotter's Badge: Rob

Tree dullness

Watford Observer: Council plants trees

With a picture of what some trees might look like if you were to dump a body in the park.

Spotter's Badge: TRT

Potato dullness

Leicester Mercury: Unattended potato catches fire

NEVER LEAVE YOUR POTATO UNATTENDED

Spotter's Badge: Mike

Cigarettes Question to Which the Answer is NO

South Wales Evening Post: Are a million cigarettes about to be washed up on a beach in Wales?

No.

(And picture as published in the Post. Seamless photoshop job)

Spotter's Badge: Paul

Spice Girls dullness

Watford Observer: Former Spice Girl gets a tattoo

Spotter's Badge:TRT

Phone box dullness

Gloucestershire Echo: Phone box smashed up

They still have phone boxes?

Spotter's Badge: Mike

Office visit dullness

Bournemouth Echo: Civic Society tours newspaper offices

In order to find stories for this site, I have a Google News Search for "Civic Society" to catch just this kind of dullness. I don't mind telling you that it's destroying my sanity.

Chicken dullness

Bath Chronicle: Chicken found

How many times to we hear this same old story? Man meets chicken, man loses chicken, man finds chicken, man professes his love for chicken in the local news media. Beautiful.

Spotter's Badge: Marjorie

Cafe dullness

Bromley News Shopper: Cafe closes for a bit

The people of Petts Wood will have starved by then

Spotter's Badge: Neil

Tortoise dullness

Dorset Echo: 'Stolen' tortoise found

...in owner's back garden.

Smart detective work, Lou.

Traffic jam dullness

East Anglia Daily Times: Car crash causes traffic jam

Who would have thought?

Spotter's Badge: Dave

Huge dogs weirdness

Cambridge News: Dogs the size of cows spotted by Cambridge nutter

"Now, Dougal, let's try this again. These cows are small. While those over there are FAR AWAY"

Spotter's Badge: Mark

Lost jacket dullness

Henley Standard: Man leaves jacket in bar

A tale of woe, told in two paragraphs

Spring dullness

Henley Standard: Spring happens

This despite gays getting equal marriage, Henley councillor David Silvester

Ice cream dullness

Barnsley Chronicle: Ice cream licking record attempt

BUT IT'S FOR CHARITY KLAXON

Spotter's Badge: L0wey

Postman Pat dullness

Ipswich Star: Tree looks a bit like Postman Pat

...but only on the CBeebies Horror Channel

Big Cat Question To Which The Answer Is NO

Gloucester Citizen: Are there big cats in Gloucestershire?

No.

Rocks dullness

ABC Newcastle (Aus): Rocks found on beach

Also present: Sand.

Spotter's Badge: Maynard

Dinosaur weirdness

Crawley News: Do you own a copy of photoshop? Good. So does the Crawley News

Absolutely seemless

Spotter's Badge: Skuds

Hair transplant dullness

Somerset Guardian: Local TV presenter has hair transplant

I'm going to call this one - it's all very cunningly hidden, but: PRESS RELEASE DISGUISED AS NEWS KLAXON

Spotter's Badge: Rob W

Ghostly Question To Which The Answer Is NO

Watford Observer: Is this a ghost?

NO

And from the same day's edition:

Watford Observer: Fog in Watford

AAARGH A GHOST!

Spotter's Badge: TRT

Recruitment company press release disguised as news

Leamington Courier: Something about a recruitment company in the Coventry and Warwickshire area

Degree of difficulty: They have an exclamation mark in their name

Spotter's Badge: Rob

Crime of the century dullness

Somerset County Gazette: Police appeal over theft of scotch egg

The snack food of kings

Puddle dullness

Watford Observer: With all local crime solved, police seek victim of puddle drenching outrage

STRING THEM UP. The victims, too - it'll teach them not to be victims in future.

Spotter's Badge: TRT.

Cake dullness

Northampton Chronicles: Man who's been on the TV bakes cakes

NONE OF WHICH ARE CHOCOLATE

Spotter's Badge: Mike

Rocking horse dullness

Eastern Daily Press: Museum gets new exhibit

The horse, people, the horse.

Spotter's Badge: Dave

More more celebrity spot dullness

Bromley News Shopper: Professor Green spotted buying a takeaway

I have every suspicion he's not actually a professor

Spotter's Badge: Neil
 

Manchester Evening News: Footballer takes train

Interestingly, there’s also a bit of history outlining how some other people that worked for the same football club have also taken trains in the past. 

Spotter's Badge: Chris

More celebrity spot dullness

Brentwood Gazette: Is this Niall from One Direction in a car?

Answer: Who cares?

Incidentally, this is the 666th post on this site, proof indeed that 1D are Satan's spawn

Spotter's Badge: Barry

Stopped clock dullness

Wokingham Times: Town Hall clock is right twice a day

I'm told the Woky Times will be live blogging this until it's fixed.

Baked bean dullness

Halifax Courier: Woman rescued from baked bean tin

Heaven knows they come with a full instruction leaflet

Spotter's Badge: TV's Derren Brown

Notice board dullness

Henley Standard: Allotments get notice boards

Glad Henley's got over that UKIP councillor nastiness and got back to the real issues.

Toilet seat dullness

Bridgwater Mercury: Kid stuck in toilet seat

Happy ending! He's still there

More weather dullness

Brighton Argus: Talk on the weather called off due to the weather

IRONY KLAXON